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| Stuck in a dead-end job? Daydreaming about a new career? Combing through the classifieds for your next calling? Well, what about this job?
Roadkill Collector: Must be able to work long hours braving oncoming traffic while picking up creatures of various size and breed and in various states of decay. Benefits include working outdoors. Strong stomach a plus.
Can you believe people actually do this for a living? If you go to your 25th year High School reunion, what would you tell people you do? Would you say, "I'm a master of zoological retrieval," or "I scoop dead stuff off the road and throw em into the back of my pick-up?"
I bet you would get a cool hat and uniform with a pretty neat logo like "You kill it; we grill it!" | | |
| I have been very frustrated with my cell phone lately! The buttons on my stinkin phone dont work very well or not at all. Like just now the only people i could call were my mom, cuz shes my most recent call (and Im proud of it!) and the 9 speed dial peeps that are listed 1-9 in my phone book, including voicemail. The remaining 8 Im not sure who I have in those slots... so I dont have alot of options. I better look into getting a new one.
I went to get wings at B-dubs tonight with Riggs, Branscum, and Sharpie. It was way cool. I (we) cant wait for the the Fall semester to start. I want to move into the dorms. I want to meet cool freshman. I want to disciple men. I want to share my faith. I want freshamn to realize that following God with all you got is not uncool. I want to see gobs of new faces that first CRU meeting. I want people to have the oporunity to respond to the Gospel. Heck, I want to see people come to Christ. I want to go on staff. I want Brad Dukes. I want to leave a legacy. I want Scooby Snacks. I want to go to Fall Getaway and shoot people 20 feet into the air on the Blob (am I calling myself fat?) I want to learn Sign Language. I want to have a family.I want to go to Turkey. I want to go to Ocean City. I want to take people to Turkey and Ocean City. I want to have pillow talk with Eric and Derek. I want to teach. I want to learn. I want my family to know Jesus. The cool thing is, God wants the same.
Man I want to see alot happen. So why dont I do something about it?
...I think I will. | | |
| WOW... what an incredible story I have! Well I'm not sure if
you've noticed or not, but this is my first post in nearly two and a
half months. This strange and extended absence is due to my being
locked inside the janitor closet on the fourth floor of Carter East
until just this morning. I ventured into the janitor closet in
the pursuit of some trash bags to put all my teddy bears in, when the
door closed behind me, not to be opened again until this glorious 13th
day of July. Let me tell you how I stayed alive. Well with the
closing of Carter for the summer, I was all alone. My only
companion was a mouse I befriended by the name of Ferdinand. This
little guy saved my life. My life was sustained by the small
amounts of dried rice and beans from Salsa's Mexican Grill that little
Ferdi would venture out to bring me. You might be wondering how I kept
up with my daily hygiene. Dont worry ladies... I used an old
toilet brush and peroxide to brush my teeth and there was an unlimited
supply of that pink hand soap to wash Ferdi and myself. Ferdinand
is a little more modest than I so he would go down to the 3rd floor
bathroom in his little mouse robe to bathe. I kept from going
insane by counting random things... such as the numbe of leg hairs in a
1-inch square on my shin or counting the number of times the letter R
appears on a standard bottle of Works liquid toilet bowl cleaner.
As you can see from my new profile pic, the two and a half months did a
number on my appearance. Kinda looks like i was in there for two
and a half centuries huh? Well the fumes from all those cleaners
made my skin and hair age at an incredible rate, not to mention the
"fumes" caused by my own scarce diet of beans and rice. But hey,
I look on the bright side... I got a whole new respect for Henry
David Thoreau's ideals of Simplicity at Walden Pond, I lost a few
pounds, and IM ALIVE! The cleaning crew let me out this morning
as they are beginning to prepare the dorms for move-in in the
Fall. And can you believe they had no compassion on me... but
rather were quite ticked I used so much handsoap. Im sorry for
the rise in tuition, fellow UT Rockets, because I fear I may have
something to do with that. This school needs to pay for more
handsoap now. But, ladies and gentlemen, I feel proud in saying
that this rise in tuition to pay for the stinkin soap is worth my
life! I truly thank you for your support.
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| Happy Cinco de Uno! Man, it doesn't seem real that this is the last week of school... I think I'm in denial. Wow, what a year. I think it's fun to look back at my life a year ago and see how I've become the man I am today, happy where I am, but always wanting more. I mean, I've grown up, met some amazing people that have impacted my life for all of eternity, hopefully reciprocated that blessing to others, experienced new things, locked arms with guys that have similar passions, and just enjoyed life! So thanks to all of you I've been blessed to have crossed paths with this past year!
I think the one thing I've enjoyed most of all I expereinced this year is by far, the guys in my Bible Study! Daniel, Ben, Riggs, Gids, Joe, Marc, Josh, and Stuart... you guys rock my pickle slicer!
OK, enough of this sappy Kerry Klima... I want a motorcylce! I have to say Im quite jealous of Steener! I talked to my dad and hes gonna see if he can find any junk bike's sittin around at any of his friends' houses that I can bum for a summer or somethin. I doubt I buy one or anything but I just think it would be mad fun!
There is also a slim chance that all 3 of the Klima kids will be up here at UT in the Fall. I wll most def be up here, but my younger brother Cody is most likely livin in Parks and my older sis Jess might be comin here fro Grad classes. That would be fabtabulous!
Peace in the middle east yo
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| I have a severe case of sophomoritis! I just can't get motivated to enjoy class... I know it's not such a good thing.... The countdown says that Kerry J Klima I has 8 days left! That puts a joyous smile upon my face. You may think Im crazy but Im actually looking forward to Finals Week. 1) It means Im almost done! 2) I only have 3 scholastic appointments which means 3) I have alot of time to enjoy life, Jesus, and the weather! 4) Some studly women are having a cookout for the guys in my Bible Study! Yeah Godly women!
So I've been having this recurring dream (at one point, several nights a week) that was basically the same each time: I am done with Finals on Wednesday of Finals Week and they always put a huge dumpster behind Carter for junk and trash people throw away as they move out of the dorms. Well in my dream I pack up all my stuff in the pickemup truck on Wednesday and stay until the end of the week, and all I do all day Thursday and Friday is "Dumpster Dive!" People throw away some amazing stuff! You would be surprised! So in my dream I pull the truck up beside the dumpster and sit on the tailgate all day and throw a bunch of carpets that people are throwing away into the back of my truck. Then over the summer I washed all of them at a car wash and then dried them in the sun and rolled them up. Then I took them back to school in the Fall and sold them outside The Quad (where Im living next year - yeah Quad!) and sold them for like 40 bucks. Other people sell new ones for over $100 so Id be giving peolpe a deal!
This is genius! I think Im gonna do it for real! It's Biblical... Im half joking, but it really is. Check out Matthew chapter 1 and 2. God spoke to Joseph and the Magi (wise men) through dreams on mulitiple occasions. I have not raised a Messiah nor do I own anything close to resembling gold, frankenstein, or Myrrh but I think this dream is divine.
Catch y'all on the flipside! | | |
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